Johnny Depp returns as Capt. Jack Sparrow who is sought after by the British, fearsome Blackbeard, his daughter and former lover of Sparrow, Angelica (Cruz) just so that he could direct them towards the fountain of youth before the Spanish find it. Reaching the destination is obviously not a cake walk as it has its challenging terms and conditions, twists & turns.
Running for 2 hours 17 minutes, the film isn't too long for discomfort. It's the film's incoherent plot, unwanted characters and slow paced screenplay which make you squirm in your seat.
A slow paced movie can work provided you have a compelling story and characters that develop as the film progresses. None of that happens here, making the film a complete drag as a result.
Director Rob Marshall himself seems confused at one point wondering as to what to do with his multiple characters and their irrelevant subplots. He thus decides to introduce generic sword fights after every scene. After a while you don't even bother to keep track of who is fighting whom? The director's motto seems to be 'If you can't charm the audiences, confuse them'.
Speaking of charm, even Depp as Sparrow looks a tad jaded barring few scenes where he decides to turn his charm and trademark swagger on. Its not completely his fault considering the script has very little for him in order to impress. His funny one-liners are way too few. There is no sexual tension between Sparrow and Angelica which one would ideally want to see. No sparks fly between the supposed former lovers who do attempt to indulge in some flirtatious banter every now then a lot like Zorro (Banderas) and his wife Elena (Zeta Jones) but all in vane.
The arrival and attack of the killer vampire-esque mermaids are probably the only track which holds your attention.
One-legged Captain Barbossa ( Geoffrey Rush) and his conversations with Sparrow are relieving and so is Dame Judi Dench's quick but interesting cameo in the carriage.
Ample time has been given to the romance between a religious Philip ( Sam Claflin) and one of the mermaids (Astrid Berges-Frisbey) but it only adds to your exhaustion and tests the patience.
The 3D does little to uplift the film from its mediocrity.
The tides are too boring this time for you to risk that plunge into your expensive cinema halls.
